


Its too damn hot.

by yes_but_only_half_a_cup



Category: Homestuck
Genre: EriSol - Freeform, Fluff, M/M, eridan being a total twat
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-28
Updated: 2016-08-08
Packaged: 2018-07-27 08:59:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,361
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7611802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yes_but_only_half_a_cup/pseuds/yes_but_only_half_a_cup
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which an overheated and frustrated seadweller gets snubbed by a certain yellowblooded psionic over trollian and investigates to find out why, only to find that said psionic has air conditioning and too much time on his hands.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. CA: fuck the fish

**Author's Note:**

> This is my very first fanfiction so it may be a little cringy, although I hope you'll like it. The pacing is a little slow at first so you may just want to skip ahead a chapter or two.

‘Oh my cod. I’m gonna die.’ Thought an overheating seadweller. It was over a hundred degrees outside Eridan’s hive, and the violet blood refused to dress according to the weather. Now, this would all be okay if he didn’t live in a ship with absolutely zero air conditioning. Sadly for him, this wasn’t the case, and the inside of his ship was just as hot as the outside, if not stuffy. He could easily solve his problem if he wanted to, by wearing shorts instead of skinny jeans, a tee shirt instead of the long sleeve shirt with his sign on it, and completely giving up his cape and scarf. Yes, these were all amazing ideas. Ideas that would help with his heat problem and make him a more comfortable troll. But, being the diva he was, Eridan’s mindset was more fashion over function. ‘Oh wwell. After all, pain is beauty, right? Right.’ Eridan thought as his fins flared in a vain attempt to cool himself off. He didn’t remember where he’d heard that phrase but he didn’t really care either. It was simply too hot to care. Eridan decided to take his mind off of the intense heat by strolling over to his husktop and checking his messages. After narrowly avoiding random guns and wands scattered across his room (he really needed to get his shit together and clean his damn room) he sat down at his husktop and looked to see if anyone had sent him anything. He had a message from Feferi, but otherwise his Trollian account was bare. This was more frustrating than usual because he’d actually sent some messages out to his friends, and none of them had actually replied yet. ‘At least Fef wwants to talk to me...maybe she wwants to hang out?’ Eridan clicked on the private chat between him and the heiress, and was a bit disappointed with what he saw.

CC: )(ey eri-fin!  
CC: So, I know t)(at you know t)(at its SUP-ER )(OT out rig)(t now  
CC: and i just wanted to remind you to drink plenty of water  
CC: so your gills dont dry out!!!  
CC: also, Gl'bgolyb is getting )(ungry again  
CC: u)(, no rus)(..but i t)(ink t)(at s)(ould be taken care of before anyfin else youre doing  
CC: anywaves! Get back to me w)(en you can!  
CC: later ampora! 8)

No, she didn’t want to hang out. Apparently what she wanted to do was tell him things he already knew. Well, at least she cared. 

CA: hey fef  
CA: yeah i knoww its hot as shell out here  
CA: thanks for the reminder  
CA: anywway  
CA: yeah ill get to feedin your lusus dont get your kelp in a twwist  
CC: 'kelp in a twist'?  
CC: 8/  
CA: okay yeah i knoww i can do better than that  
CA: but i dont reely feel like it  
CA: its too damn hot for quality fish puns  
CA: speakin of the heat it must be nice havvin your hivve under the wwater  
CC: you know, if you wanted to cool off,  
CC: you could, i dont know...  
CC: GO SWIMMING FOR ONC-E!!!!  
CA: ugh  
CA: i dont eel like goin swwimming  
CC: t)(e fis)( miss you.  
CA: good  
CA: fuck the fish

Well that had gone swimmingly. Eridan sighed and decided to start bothering someone else.

caligulasAquarium [CA] began trolling twinArmageddons [TA]  
CA: sol  
CA: hey  
CA: landwweller  
CA: sollux  
CA: sooooollux.  
CA: ...  
CA: captor?  
CA: ugh.  
CA: wwhatevver  
caligulasAquarium [CA] has ceased trolling twinArmageddons [TA]

Eridan huffed and ran a hand through his hair. He had no time for lowblooded landscum that was just going to ignore him anyway. Okay, that was a total lie. He would’ve quite happily appreciated a response from the psionic and probably would’ve initiated a lengthy conversation. But if Sollux couldn’t even bother to spend two seconds of his time typing a response, Eridan wouldn’t bother to wait for him. Instead, the violet blood bid a quick goodbye to his fuschia blooded counterpart and got up to grab his rifle. He had lusii to kill.


	2. Knocking is for losers.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A pissed seadweller barges in on a eerily calm psionic and is surprised by the yellowbloods reaction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter barely qualifies as a chapter. Its so short! XD

It had been about two hours since Eridan had conversed with Feferi, and in those two hours he had gone and picked the sea clean of every lusus that he could find. Usually, he and Fef had a schedule, and he’d only go out to kill one or two at a time, but with the heat as it currently was, he decided it would be a better plan to just to stockpile a whole bunch of lusii, and keep Gl'bgolyb happy for longer. As Eridan was riding Seahorse Dad back over the sea and to his hive, he had a thought. ‘I wwonder wwhat Sollux is doin’ right noww…’ To be fully honest, he couldn't get the yellowblood out of his head. Thoughts like ‘Wwhy didn’t he respond to me?’ and ‘Couldn’t he at least tell me to fuck off or somefin?’ kept popping up in his head. It was all a bit distracting. After he had dropped off the bodies of the lusii he’d killed, he asked his lusus to drop him off on land. He knew the way to the psionics hive. 

* * *

‘I am such a fuckin’ idiot.’ Eridan was seriously regretting his decision to walk to Sollux’s hive. ‘Wwhat the hell wwas I thinking??’ His lusus had dropped him off not too far from his destination, but the heat was making him grumpy and more irritable than usual. As he neared the Communal Hive Stem that housed the Gemini, he was getting odd looks from trolls who were just walking down the street, doing their thing. He didn’t blame them though, he did stick out. He was walking down the street in his eccentric clothes holding a glowing rifle, and on top of that highbloods weren’t known for visiting this area. He didn’t care if people stared. They were all lower than dirt anyway. Eridan finally made it to the Communal Hive Stem and stormed up the stairs until he found the respriteblock he was looking for. Crosshair’s in hand, he didn’t bother knocking.


	3. Ooooh my god.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eridan is a douche and Sollux is amused by his overdramatic antics.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaand another long chapter. So far this fic has been a short chapter squished between two large ones. This is all i have right now, but cuddles and popsicles will ensue in the next chapter. :)

‘Ooooh my god. What the everloviing fuck?’ Was Sollux’s first thought after an frustrated, and obviously overheated seadweller busted into his respriteblock. “Eriidan?” He said evenly. He wasn’t upset, or even fazed too much. “Sollux.” Replied the seadweller. “Wwhy didn’t you respond to me?” It was at this point that Sollux started to laugh. “iith that what thiith iith about?” The psionic stood up and strode over to Eridan, flicking his nose dismissively, not scared by the rifle at all. “You’re telliing me, that becauthe ii diidn’t rethpond to you iin record tiime, that you dragged your thorry ath all the way over here to kiick down my door and tell me off?” Sollux started laughing harder. This was too good. Sollux knew that Eridan had feelings for him but this took the proverbial pastry. Eridan seemed a little shocked at Sollux’s actions, however. He had just busted in to Sollux’s respriteblock with his scary ass rifle and Sollux was laughing about it. Eridan started to feel a little bit awkward and a bit less confident than he was when he had stormed in. “Sol...wwhy’re you laughing?” He asked, not sounding like he did a few minutes ago. “Becauthe youre abtholutly hiilariiouth. II mean, look at you! You came all thiith way becauthe you over-reacted about me not rethpondiing to your dumb methageth. iith almotht cute.” Cute? Eridans cheeks flushed at the psionic calling him ‘Cute’. He wasn’t cute. He was fuckin’ highblooded, seadwelling royalty! That was supposed to mean he was scary and intimidating..! “Aww, nothiiing to thay anymore? Well that’th fiine. Sollux looked thoughtful as the seadweller tried to hide his embarrassment. “You can thtay, but at least take off thome of your clotheth. We don't want friied theadweller now do we?” Sollux used his psionics to shut the door Eridan had left open and unwrapped Eridans scarf from around his neck, letting the little gills beneath breathe and flare out. “H-hey…! Sollux, givve that back…!” Eridan reached for his scarf, but Sollux balled it up and held it over his head. “Come on hiighblood, take iit back!” Eridan stood on his tip toes to reach for his scarf and still couldn’t get it. During the heat, Sollux couldn’t really find anything to do. Sitting in one place for hours on end and coding didn’t appeal to him as much as it usually did, considering the temperature. So when Eridan had stormed into his hive, he saw it as an entertainment opportunity. “Sol, you ass, givve it!” While Eridan was distracted with getting back his scarf, Sollux decided to use his psionics to take Eridans cape off of his shoulders. The seadweller yelped quietly and glared at the psionic as he threw the clothes behind him. “You know...you’re quiite alot thmaller wiithout your thupiid cape.” Sollux remarked. He noticed that Eridan wasn’t as tall as he presented himself, and that his frame was rather petite. Eridan huffed and crossed his arms, still glaring. “So? I could still kick your ass anytime i wwanted to.” Sollux raised his eyes at this. “Tho you could kiick my ath but you cant retriieve your own cape? Iinterethtiing.” Eridan didn’t respond to that and instead suddenly found the ground very interesting to stare at. “ED jutht admiit iit- youre hot ath hell and iim doiing you a favor by lettiing you thtay iin my niice, aiir condiitioned block, and thtriippiing you of your gaudy clotheth.” Eridan squirmed a little and struggled to say something. Anything would be better than just standing there in silence. He knew Sollux was right, but hell if he was going to let him know. Eridan instead huffed and flared his fins. “Thanks i guess.” He mumbled. Sollux didn’t really expect anything more from the seadweller and papped his head condescendingly. “Youre tho cute when you try to be niice.” Eridan bristled and shrugged off Sollux’s hand. “Stop callin’ me cute! And don’t talk to me like im a pet.” Sollux simply shrugged at this. “My hiive, my ruleth.”


	4. That’th tho…cute!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sollux gets the grumpy fish lord to dress down, and gives him a popsicle in reward.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hehe, just some pure cuddling and fin rubbing! Honestly, the most intense that this fanfic will get is a little make out session between these two dorks. (hint for next chapter shenanigans ;) )

After struggling with Sollux a little more, Eridan had given up on getting his clothes back. He was then wrestled into a pair of too big shorts that the psionic had “lent” (forcefully got Eridan to put on) and a shirt with a yellow gemini symbol on it. There was at least one upside to this; Sollux had agreed to give him a popsicle if he didnt whine about the clothes. “Sooollux, can you hurry up and grab the popsicles already? Im hot.” Eridan liked to draw out the psionics name like taffy because he knew it got on his counterparts nerves. “Hold your damn hoofbeathtth and thtop whiiniing!” Currently, Eridan was curled up in front of a fan and on top of a couch. Sollux snickered to himself as he walked back with a creamsicle in each hand. Eridan looked so goddamn small in clothes that were too big for him and all curled up like that. ‘Oh my god. He’th a thmall liittle miinnow…! That’th…’That’th tho…cute!’ Sollux thought to himself. “Hey athhole ii got you a creamthiicle.” Eridan was about to say something along the lines of ‘Wwhat took you so long?” but instead Sollux shoved it in his mouth instead of handing it to him and giving him a chance to complain. Eridan looked like wanted to protest but he soon thought otherwise and instead calmed down a little bit. Ice cream on hot days seemed to pacify him nicely, which Sollux noted. Eridans scowl slowly lessened as the sweet treat melted in his mouth, and he started to relax a bit. Sollux sat down next to him and started licking at his own creamsicle, watching the seadweller closely. As Eridan relaxed, his fins would twitch at the slightest sound, which Sollux thought was a mixture of kinda freaky and pretty cool. “ED, c’mere...lay down on my lap.” Eridan, not as uptight and as tense as usual, compliantly laid his head on his hosts lap and cuddled up to him, finding no reason to object to this. Sollux reached down and ever so gently brushed his hand against one of Eridans fins, making the seadweller squeak a little and tense up. “Relax man…”Sollux encouraged, and Eridan tried to relax, which oddly enough was hard to do when someone you thought you hated could easily damage one of your most fragile body parts. After a little bit of messing around with Eridans fin, Sollux found that just barely running his fingertips across the fin made the seadweller sleepy, and he proceeded to repeat that action until the prince was asleep in his lap, a little bit of creamsicle left on his face and lips.


	5. ...dumbath

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sollux says something that damages Eridans oh-so-sensitive pride and ends up getting a kiss for it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I dont feel that this chapter was as well written as the rest of the fic. Oh well. :P

Eridan hadn’t realized he had fallen asleep in Sollux’s lap until he woke up to the sound of a video game being played at medium volume. The psionic was reclining against the couch and nonchalantly playing a game on his DS (He was playing animal crossing. He had a perfect town and was really fucking proud of it too.) . As the seadweller stirred from his nap, he realized that it was dark outside, and that he was considerably cooler than he was an hour ago. “Oh, you’re fiinally awake. Damn, I wath uthiing your head ath a table of thortth. II managed to balance an entiire water bottle on you and you diidnt even notiice. IIt theemth iive found a uthe for you after all.” While Sollux grinned smugly, if not a little dorkily down at Eridan. The Ampora started to growl softly and sit up. His scowl went away for a minute as he stretched, then it returned and he sat facing Sollux, crossing his arms. “You make it sound like my job isn’t to make shore that evvery livvin’ being on this planet doesn’t get krilled by a huge lusus that could end our species in one terrifying glub.” Sollux waved this statement away with a little hand gesture. “Oh nevermiind that, trutht me, you’re much more uthful ath a table.” He shot a sly grin at the now pissed seadweller. Man, two minutes after waking up and already Eridan was upset and scowling again. “Yeah, wwell i dont expect some scumblooded ‘athhole’ to understand the implications of my vvery important rank and the responsibilities that it tides.” Sollux blinked a little. Had this stupid fish really just mocked his lisp. Wow. Rude much? “Wuh-well, excuse me, your hiighneth, had ii known that the thtiick up your ath wath tho far up there ii would’ve never even thought about iinthultiing you.” Sollux’s voice was dripping with sarcasm and black-rom style hate. If Eridan was going to make fun of his lisp, fine, but he’d better be prepared to be made fun of for his stupid thick-and-wavy accent. Eridan bristled and shot Sollux a death glare. This infuriating lowblooded sack of barnyard animal shit didn’t know when to stop. To be fair, Eridan also didn’t know when to stop. Since the two trolls didn’t have an official quadrant and no auspistice (Dear lord, they needed one.) they hadn’t even thought about talking about boundaries. Oh well. Some lessons are hard learned. Eridan started to growl softly and stood up, reaching for his gun. And he kept reaching, finding nothing. Eridan was temporarily distracted by his lack of a huge, glowing harpoon gun. He spun around and then also realized his glasses weren’t on his face. He turned to Sollux, frustrated and starting to seethe. “Wwhere’d you hide them.” He accused, assuming the Captor would know what he was talking about. “Why do you athk? Are you too afraiid to fiight me when you’re not behiind the thafety of your gun?” Sollux decided to take a shot at Eridans pride rather than tell him where his gun was. In all honesty, he just didn’t want to face that scary rifle and get his hive blown up. As for the violetbloods glasses, he truly didn’t know where they had went- oh wait. There they were. On the top of Eridans head, like a headband of sorts. ‘...dumbath.’ He thought to himself as he rolled his eyes. The ploy worked and Eridan huffed quietly. “Of course Im not afraid. I don’t evven need my gun to beat your neanderthal-esque ass.” Sollux put his game down and stood up, a full couple inches taller than the seadweller. “You thiink too hiighly of yourthelf.” It was at this moment that Eridan leaned forward and angrily kissed his host, biting at his lips and growling a little. This lasted for about five seconds before he pulled away awkwardly. “I..dont knoww wwhat that wwas..uh..sorry.” His eyes were a little wide and he didnt seem angry anymore. He looked like he expected Sollux to yell at him or be angry. “That wwas... wweird of me, i dont knoww wwhy i did that.” Sollux also looked less angry and more confused, maybe even a little surprised. The sudden kiss was nice, but an erratic move, even for Eridan. After a moment of silence, Sollux spoke up. “Well..thiit, Ampora... II never thaid you had to thtop.”


	6. “Wath..that a glub?”

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Eridan decides to kiss Sollux again and they end up cuddling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this update was so late, I got really busy! Anyway, here's the last chapter to my first fanfic, I hope you enjoyed reading it. :)

Eridan stood in Sollux’s room, not sure what to do. Should he kiss the psionic again? Or should he brush him off and say that the kiss was a mistake. Eridan decided to go with the former and kissed his host again. This time, he was softer and less bitey. Sollux gently kissed back after placing his hands on the others hips, and started to emit a soft buzzing noise, almost like a purr. They kissed for a little bit longer before Eridan pulled away with a faint blush on his cheeks. “Sol..wwhat are wwe evven doin’?” He asked quietly. “Well, iif obthervatiion would iindiicate anythiing, iit theemth that we’re makiing out.” Sollux replied. The seadweller rolled his eyes. “Yes I knoww wwhat wwe’re doin’, my main question is wwhy are wwe doing it?” Sollux shrugged. “II dunno. IIt paciifiied the thiituatiion niicely though.” Eridan nodded in agreement. “Yeah..I guess it did.” Eridan shifted awkwardly on his feet and decided to sit down again. Sollux sat next to him and pulled the seadweller closer, before speaking up. “ED, are we ever actually goiing to piick a quadrant to be iin or are we jutht goiing to pretend liike we dont have any feeliingth for eachother?” Eridan shrugged. “I don’t knoww. Does it matter that much?” Sollux paused and considered this. Did it matter? “II gueth iit’th not too iimportant…” Eridan looked up at the psionic and studied his face, watching how occasional sparks would dance around his eyes like he was trying to decide whether or not to zap something. Sollux was also eyeing his counterpart, watching how every little breath made his gills flutter and how random stimuli affected his fins, making them twitch or flare or wiggle. Sollux decided to gently pull the violet blood onto his lap so that he was facing him, and started to rub his fins. Eridan made a sudden noise, like something between a squeak and a yelp. “Wath..that a glub?” Sollux asked. Eridan just nodded and leaned onto Sollux, putting his face in the crook between Sollux’s head and shoulder. Sollux hummed quietly as he continued to rub his guests fins, and Eridan made soft fishy noises as he did so, and the pair stayed like this until they both drifted off to sleep again, Eridan resting peacefully on top of Sollux and Sollux keeping him close. Nobody knew what the atmosphere would be like in the morning, whether they’d regret this and go back to hateflirting, or whether they’d keep enjoying each other's company, but it didn’t really matter at the time. They had managed to find a temporary relief from their daily lives and stresses, and maybe that’s all that mattered. As it turns out, some good can come out of unbearable weather after all.


End file.
